Why Worry?

The young worry about that which does not matter. 

The old worry about what the perceive to matter.

The reality? 

Nothing really matters as much as we thing it does at the time. 

Spend less time worrying, more time smiling and enjoy your life, after all, it’s the only one you get. 

Why fill it with worrying? 

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Why worry?

The more you worry the worse it gets. 

You fuel the fires if doubt, they spread, eventually there is nothing left but a forgotten husk of ash. 

As we age we understand the value of letting go of worry, this leads to our freedom. 

I’m the end you will look back and wonder why you worried, the, one day will see a mirrored reflection of your past and say to them;

Why worry? 

Calm Before the Storm

“The calm sea and clear skies are soon to be broken by the Storm that approaches”

Quelling thoughts that had been creeping upon my mind I found a balance between serenity and insanity that had begun to restore the pillars that had been corrupted so long ago, it was time to take a new risk.

“Mia” had been suffering an internal torment that was all to familiar and a silence had claim her, a silence that screamed agreement and renouncement which worried me. The temptation for people to let go of their free will seemed all to common, taking he easy option rather than the stronger option.. a choice to become moulded into what someone else perceives as acceptable, I had a bad feeling that something was bad was coming. I had seen this happen several times in my life and each time I lost a good friend because I chose to walk away from them and to leave them without someone to confide in all because I was to stubborn to accept their choice.

“Sandy” and old close friend had made the same choice years ago which resulted in us growing ever more distant, from talking g to “Mia” thoughts of her reappeared in my mind I decide to send a message on social media because I began to realise as a friend I should have been there for her more and supported choice even if I didn’t agree wit it. I meet her only to find a broken person unable to relax, my past warnings had failed but looking back I should have stayed a friend, now not only had she been mentally damaged she was on the brink of breaking because she was now pregnant.

What should have been a pleasure to say only seemed to repulse her, my mind struggled to understand why so I pushed for her to open up and learnt something that filled me with rage.

“I didn’t want kids but he said that he loved me and this would make everything better so I did it for him, he has now told me to abort the baby because he is not ready… I don’t know what to do”  

This once intellectual, compassionate and confident person stood before me shaking with tears flooding her eyes, I hold her close and ask “what do you want?” She says nothing yet the look in her eyes says it all she wants him and I had a horrible feeling about her answer, she was no longer able to make choices of her own, fragile barley able to stand she answers me “I and going to terminate it” looking her in the eye “if that is your choice then please speak to a councillor as I’ve heard it can be very stressful” she tries to smile and pulls away from me.

As walk her back to her car I ask her to keep in touch, I see a glimpse of the smile she once had. Walking home the thoughts of that conversation fill me with anger that someone can change a person so much so that they always feel they are at fault and will do anything to gain acceptance, it’s a sad world we live in. I also thought of my own actions in allowing what was a close friendship to crumble, such a fool I was.

 

A Torn Person

 

“Forget the consequences and help those in need. Is it your place? Maybe not but why just sit by and watch someone suffer alone when you have a choice to help, the only person who can tell you to stop is the one you are trying to help”

 Watching someone smile can make all of our problems fade away because we begin to share their happiness but what happens when people are in pain? We run.

“Mia” had a happiness that resonated in me and brought pleasant memories back from the depths of my heart. Days passed and her happiness that she initially possessed seemed to fade from the seemingly controlling attitude of “Simon” became more apparent and the worst thing was her feelings for him were genuine and I could see it tearing into her and cracks were beginning to show which struck a very familiar cord.

Watching a close friend begin to descend into a place that I had watched someone else I cared deeply for was heart wrenching, speaking to “Mia” I offered my advice “you need to nip this in the bud sooner rather than later because it will only get worse trust me on this” I could see her mannerisms changing and she began to make small excuses and justify certain things she had told me that bothered her.

These admissions worried me it seemed she was thinking on pure emotion which would lead down a dark road taking her back to a place she had fought so hard to free herself from in a distant past before I knew her, I was not prepared to let a friend slip back into such a place.

Offering only my words and an ear to listen if needed I said to her “be careful because you are going down the same road as April did and latching onto the first person who you have feelings for  and you’re sacrificing yourself for only fleeting glimpses of happiness when you’re both together for endless hassle and questions when you’re apart” It might not have been my place to say such things but while love may indeed be blind it is not deaf perhaps a voice of concern and reason might help by giving her the strength to stand firm and make him accept he is a part of her life not her entire life.

After sitting and chatting for a few hours she had stayed strong with her decisions and wasn’t chasing him, as small a step as this might be it was a start.

Many people I see are ruled by their phones, constantly checking them every five seconds for a reply and when they see nothing madness descends causing distress, panic and anxiety because they think the fault is theirs. This is no way to live, life is about living in the here and now making choices, having fun, creating memories to look back on with a smile not a regret. After getting home I keep a small conversation going with “Mia” only to let her know that she is not alone, of all the people I know how she feels… torn.

Receiving several messages I read them and offer unbiased replies, they seemed like messages from a child who has not got his way and it reacting with anger until she crumbles under his pressure, perhaps it was because he cared or maybe because he was not used to people saying No.

“A second chance is a rare gift to give but it is ours to give and if you believe it is worth it then take the risk, we can forgive but never forget”