My curiosity was peaked this morning and I decided to look on the admin board (something I never do). I have written a post almost every day for close to two years. It surprised me that I had so much to say and keep writing. My posts have varied in length, style and meaning.
Some posts have received a wealth of comments and feedback which is greatly appreciated, it shows that there we are not alone and that others too are in a similar place.
This blog has been the cause of much controversy, it has even caused some ‘friends’ to reveal how they really feel. Often I receive a message through social media telling me how I don’t understand and that I am wrong, but I guess that’s simply because they had a rare glimpse of how someone else actually saw them for once instead of the reflection they see everyday.
I do wonder how people see me, how they perceive my written words and what their judgement would be.
To think that I am half way through my life, while still considered young I certainly do not feel that way. Perhaps it’s been the self imposed dilemmas I have been exposed to, or the years of watching someone struggle through existence with only one purpose and hold on to that last flicker of a flame until it is no longer needed.
What ever the reason I feel much older than i actually am.
Yesterday I was reading though some posts and one caught my eye. A friend had stated the he was on to get back to what he was truly passionate for ‘Writing and Helping People’ my hilarious comment of ‘Trying to reclaim your soul after selling it will be difficult mate.’ was ignored and later removed. I guess I struck a nerve.
I find it funny how people can say what others want to hear without a shred of remorse, I find it hypocritical. Very few people ever want to help anyone when there is no reward or benefit to themselves these days. However, there are those people who will always help and say they want nothing in return, yet they often bitch and moan that no one appreciates what they do for them. It would seem they do want something and it is called recognition, more often than not this is the attitude most females take because they want to have one up on someone or score a point.
There is nothing wrong with wanting something in return, after all, it’s human nature to be greedy and hoard.