I lost my wings and fell from grace
Falling, spinning, tumbling through the air that burned like white hot fire
Finally my torment resided
I lay still on the cold floors of man
Not one stops to see what lay before them
Once seen as something, now I lay here, invisible to all.
Was it my place to get involved? No.
Did it squash the situation quickly? Yes.
I do find myself losing faith in humans. A man who should have known better decided to threaten a boy who apparently drove in to the back of him, though considering his bike was still standing and he was unhurt I think this was an exaggeration.
Getting between the two I am met with animosity, a middle aged woman also came to reinforce my calm logic.
While his threats we empty I knew all he really wanted was to vent his frustration, so that’s what I let him do. Could I have verbally castrated him because he clearly hasn’t evolved much past that of a neanderthal, yes I could have but that would have solved nothing.
Shortly after he had vented his rage he subconsciously listed to me and moved his bike out of the way of the amassing traffic. I told the young boy to be more careful, but I don’t think this is a lesson he will soon forget.
What did amuse me about the angry man was how quickly he backed down to someone who stood up to him. I can understand he was angry, rightfully so because he could have indeed been hurt and his pride (bike) damaged, but neither happened. He was merely basing his anger on logical fallacy and ‘what ifs’ so he was acting on emotion, not logic.
In my younger days I would happily have fought with him and beaten him down with words and possibly force if needed, but those days are behind me now. After all, what is the point of senseless violence when the best was to deal with a bully is to simply have him calm himself down with a few cleverly laced words and suggestions.
Funny how people work.
It was the subtle look
That curious stare
Followed by the act of pretending not to care.
It can’t rain everyday,
Procrastination comes but it doesn’t stay,
Let go your worry
There is no hurry
You’ve always got tomorrow.
I am quite thehypocrite really.
Even now, after everything that’s happened I still can’t bring myself to not love her. To think, I still feel as strongly now as I did back then, what a pitiful creature I am.
It’s hard to admit that you went through Hell and back for someone who did nothing but lie to you, yet given the same choice I would do it all again for her.
Woman think that men don’t suffer emotional trauma, but this simply isn’t true. They suffer just as much as the next person, they just hide it well.
While it seems true my feelings were unique and I fell for the clever ruse they were still real to me. They are still real now and that is what holds me back, truth be told they will always hold me back because to me I had found that one person who I could truly say I loved more than myself and I would have given my life to protect her. Sadly that was just the dream of a fool caught in the spiders web, it’s doubtful any of it was real for her. I was nothing more than a plaything that could be disposed of when not needed.
Yet being the fool I walked straight in to it.
Oh well. Time to bury it all once more an continue with life.
“We want nothing more than what we want, others want the same. Until we can understand that we can only see things the way we are there be no salvation, only endless battles of will.”
Stepping in to the light to escape the dark is a choice
We come out the other side
But we are forever changed
Still who we are but
Never quite the same.