It seems the weather is very reflective of my mood today.

After having a couple of days being distracted but still aware I find today i am thrust back in to the fray. When is all of this going to stop?

When I accept to either fix this myself or sit tight and prepare for the long wait that could take years of my life… No brainer really.

I have been scouting various different places to find out anything and everything that I can, but the assurance I seek can’t be given by some of the doors I have knocked on, meaning it could all be for nothing and a reoccurrence would ensue and I couldn’t handle going through al of this again.

It angers me how people have nothing useful to offer me. All I get is ‘pep’ talks that serve little purpose, this is why I have become so recluse of late. I can’t be dealing with people who are of no use, especially when all I want is answers and solutions of tangible quality. All the words in the world can’t save me, I can only find my salvation in the steel.

The light I thought I saw was not the breaking of day but a firefly lost in the forest too, at least it can rest on me while I use it’s limited glow to traverse what lies ahead, and maybe, just maybe I can find my way out of this hell.


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