I can see you.
If I can see you. so can everyone else…
If everyone else can see you then I have no other option left. I have no other choice but to prepare myself and find the courage to do it myself.
As I stare in to the mirror and look at my body all I can see is a road map of pain. Something that has held me back time and again, yet I’ve always found a way to overcome my limitations and press on, regardless of the cost.
It seems now though that there is a roadblock in my way, it refuses me at every attempt, it is in my way. Spouting out nonsense and false logic, it tries to justify its lack of integrity by convincing me there is nothing wrong.
If that is the case then I have gone truly mad.
Rational thinking was always a strong point of mine, but now the line has become smeared between genius and insanity, so much so that I no longer even know which side of the line I stand on anymore.
It will be fun, finding out.
What is it they say?
“One for sorrow?”
A lonely Magpie happily hops along in front of me, he hasn’t got a care in the world. He only needs to do what is right by him and survive, oh how I wish all life was like that. To be defined by our ability to survive and nothing else, now that would make for some interesting learning, especially when we have become obsessed with that which doesn’t really matter.
I wonder, would I survive if that was my only reason for existing?
How I envy the animals of the world. How all they have to focus on is survival, to live each day with the simple purpose of just surviving is thrilling, yet sad. If I really think about it i would say that I envy their freedom.
Maybe that’s it… Maybe I feel trapped?
Perhaps this is why I have been seeking solitude so desperately, all in the hope to find the freedom I want, or the freedom I once had at least.
I guess no matter what side of this blurry line I eventually end up on, it won’t matter as long as with it comes freedom. My freedom.