Watching all the people walk by I can’t see one smile amongst them, there are only frowns. I’m sure they are all happy enough, but I wonder is anyone else is thinking the same as me right at this moment in time?
The urge to hack myself to bits is getting stronger everyday, no amount if words seems to deter this thought pattern. People try to convince me it’s a bad idea, that I will regret it, but sadly in my mind it’s fast becoming my only option left.
I can’t hold on much longer, the mental strain is becoming unbearable.
This choice would hurt those closest to me, but even that thought is becoming overshadowed by the constant distress. I can’t attain option one, it’s out of my reach, option two would be a lengthy process if knock backs and psych evaluations. Therefore, in my own mind, option three is the only one that makes sense anymore.
If I do this would I succeed or would I cause irreparable damage?
Either way, I’m running out of time.