We can’t out run them, we can only hold on until they take over.




Emotion clouds judgement, but it is in this we must trust.




I’ve never known which is is right, emotion or intellect, I act and await the result.

Read & Reverse

After the lights go out on you

Eventually it all ends

But I fight to keep it the same

The world is cruel

I will end where I began

Life is a long road

Filled with bitterness and joy

With smiles and tears

Laughter and sadness

Are those people who make me feel

Ever more happy and content

They guide me through troubled times

Forgetting all the hate

I thank them

Those saving me from being lost

Clearing the path of muddy leaves

I can see it now

The real path

My eyes are open

I am free…


If you can see, I shouldn’t need to tell you

You will never understand me


There is only one thing which separates you from everyone you aspire to be… it’s one simple thing and you will never have it until you realise nothing else matters.

Unwavering purpose!

The commitment to achieve no matter the cost, that is what make the difference between you and everyone in your way.

Family Fued…

A mighty argument it was.
Truths were told and each persons true nature was revealed.
My loathing is truly frightening. To think you can care so little for someone who raised you for so long, it’s strange to feel that numb to it all but after years of the broken record repeating itself what else can be expected really. I guess years of the same things being thrown in your face slowly kill all the nerve endings. 
The time has come to now venture the world and see what else is out there. I will survive as always and wait patiently for the day it’s all mine.


Things seemed to level out for a brief period, but now it seems thing are reverting back to the way they were.

I say ‘levelled out’ easier to cover up is what I mean. It’s just easier not to admit what’s really going on inside your head, people don’t ever really want to hear the truth anyway.

Yesterday I could see the frustration in her eyes, she wants to have me commit or at least make a promise that there will be some form of larger commitment. I have never done well with being forced in to a corner, it only makes me more dangerous in the sense that I will do everything I can to get out of the corner, no matter the cost. Much like the days in the ring, Oh how I miss them so.

Beginning to reminisce the endless hours I spent fighting I always made sure I had control of the ring or arena. Never straying from the centre unless it was to counter strike or a part of my larger plan, I do miss fighting… I miss the honour, I miss how it is only you and him, nothing else matters in that moment. Win or lose, nothing is simpler. You either win the fight or you don’t, no areas of grey, only how it should be.

I guess I’ve always felt this way about life. You are either in control or you’re being backed in to a corner. Offered ultimatums by those who care because just like you they want so badly to win.

As selfish as it sounds it’s my life, I will do things on my terms. I will do things when I’m ready and nothing will ever change that… Perhaps that’s why I always end up alone, because I see everything as a challenge, a fight that has to be won because although we speak about ‘compromise’ that to me is simply a fancy word for losing.

A compromise always favours the victor.

To the victor go the spoils.

It Closed.

I find myself in the midst by suffocating people, the drain the life from all that surrounds them.

My patience wears thin, avoidance is the easiest course of action. After all, you can’t argue with idiots because they simply drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

The world used to be filled with colour, now all I see is a dull grey, shrouded in the mist of depressive tendencies. How dreary I do sound. My recent state of mind has been echoed in this blog fro quite some time now, what was once filled with raw emotion and perspective is now nothing more than a black whole that devours all the light around it.

I’m sorry, but I’m not apologising to you. Oh no, my apology is a selfish one. I’m sorry for me, for letting this take over, for not having the strength I needed to do what had to be done.

What a mess.

I loath this world so much now. It has nothing to offer me except bitter disappointment and reality, I think I preferred it when I couldn’t see it for what it was, to see people for who they really were… I would much rather live in the ignorance just like everyone else but that door is forever closed to me. My eyes have been opened and I hate what I can now see.

We are being overcome by the chaos, it’s tipping the balance.

There is so much we refuse to accept, so ┬ámuch suffering that we care little for because it doesn’t effect us. We only care when it suits us or makes us look good, we are such hypocrites. I am such a hypocrite. I hate myself, the self pity disgusts me but it’s all I’ve grown to know recently. Oh my friends, I wish you knew how I understand you so well, but I just don’t care for your problems, but then again you wouldn’t want the truth from me anyway.

The truth… No one wants it, but it’s always there.

What is my truth?

I am everything that’s wrong with the world, but at least I can admit it.


You’ve grown so thin.. So weak… So frail.

Is there anything left that once was I do wonder? Possibly, possibly not but it’s none of my concern anymore anyway. Though I would be lying if I was to say that I didn’t think about how you were each time you accidentally cross my sight.

I wonder… do you ever wonder about me?

After all, you make a great effort to head in the other direction when I appear in yours.