Still unable to see past what she can’t understand, despite how many times it is claimed, the sentence always ends with the same word ‘but’. This word only confirms a frightened attitude that is still closed off, unable to accept my point of view.
I was asked if I truly understood her reasons and feelings on the situation, simply put the answer is yes because I agree and accept all the points made, and this is how I know there is still more that is held back because that would be the situation if I was in that position, everything is accounted for except one last fact, raw emotion.
Admissions of familiarity, comfort and easy have now been spoken which are steps towards opening up. After spending so many years running from confrontation and refusing to listen to deeper thoughts, choosing to block them out by any means necessary it stops the open honesty I seek.
I do not believe anything deeper lies at the heart of this matter, I do however want to hear all the feelings and emotions she had at the time of her choice because not all of them have been spoken yet, I feel she holds more back and is unwilling to listen to herself. This is my view on the situation and is only compounded by her silence.
The damage has been done, I can do nothing to repair it, all I can do is listen and all she can do is talk.
I value spoken words.