The Greatest Lie

“The Greatest lie ever told consists of only three words…”

I believed that lie.

I opened up and with my mind, body, heart and soul gave myself to someone because of that lie… 

To say such words at a whim requires a special type of person who when they leave this world have a special place in Hell waiting for them.

To say these words and not mean then is cruelty incarnate, nothing short of evil.

To use any means to get why they want at the time, only to cast away the outdated object they once sought.

Even though the feelings subside the pain still remains, becoming more infrequent but still able to pierce a heart like a knife through warm butter.

…Ramblings of a fool who once believed the greatest lie ever told.

Still Healing

“As we lay in the dark emptiness of the night all we can do is think.”

Even though more time has passed and wonderful new memories has grown we still have those moments when all we want to do is cry. 

Letting go is a hard thing to do when you truly cared, even after how we are treated by people somehow we still cared.

I am by no means perfect, I have hurt, broken and scared people who did not deserve such treatment. Still they all had one thing in common, they all moved on quickly. Meaning that all they really sought was someone, anyone so they wouldn’t have to be alone.

If you were to ask me where this aching feeling came from I couldn’t tell you, in my mind I had found myself again and was reborn anew with a different view on life. 

This overwhelming feeling was crippling, unable to move, unable to deter my thoughts all I could do was brave the storm. 

I think more than anything it’s the look, the look that comes from the eyes who know of my story.

A look of sadness and a confusion. 

Laying in the nothingness of the night I draw a heavy breathe which is followed by a heavy sigh, a chilling presence flows through my entire body making my heart feel heavy. 

“With no more tears to shed what choices do I now have left…”

The girl with the beautiful smile.

There is nothing more beautiful than a woman who smiles.

This girl, so riddled with insecurity and doubt, she has the most beautiful smile. Listing to her story and how she feels leaves me feeling sad that someone so genuine and kind does no feel she is worth anything, not love or even friendship.

She has spent a great deal of time acting how she feels she should, trying to be what she thinks everyone wants, when all she needs do is be herself.

Trivial things make her laugh, a natural laugh, unforced and uncontrollable… I can’t help but smile when I see her begin to relax. All the time she laughs she is herself and it’s a wonderful thing to see, if only she could let go of her personal hang ups, she could be happy.

If she could see what I see, all her insecurities would vanish. I told her one day she would make someone very happy, the look in her eyes was filled with doubt because of bad memories, that said I always trust my gut feeling and I stay positive for her because it will happen, all she needs now is faith in herself.

We hold ourselves back because we do not feel we deserve what we want.

All it really take is for us to smile and show others who we really are, all it takes is that one simple action. If we accept ourselves and smile life will be good.